[A]s helpful as “thou-shalt-not” lists can be, they are limited. They can make us feel not as though we are traveling along a highway protected by a rumble strip, but through a minefield, paying more attention to avoiding danger than to progressing forward. Such lists also encourage legalism and self-justification. I can say to myself, “Well, I didn’t technically commit adultery, because we did not consummate the sexual act (though we did everything short of that . . . ).”

Peter Bouteneff, How to Be A Sinner